Anxiety

People who struggle with anxiety may experience feelings related to unease, dread and/or fear. Anxiety may create physical symptoms including headaches, racing heart, body aches or stomach upset. Anxiety oftentimes causes excessive worry and leads to feelings of irritability. The anxiety response may be expressed in behaviors which can be overwhelming for self & others. Anxiety can interfere with engagement in activities. Very commonly anxiety also impacts healthy sleep patterns. 

Unresolved Trauma

Areas of trauma can relate to many things. Often people assume it is physical, sexual or active service/military related trauma. Trauma may be unrelated to those specific triggers. There is psychological and emotional trauma as well. Trauma can present with anxiety, irritabity, emotional numbing and detachment. 

Trauma by definition

• Acute trauma which results from a single incident.

• Chronic trauma which is repeated and prolonged such as domestic/interpersonal violence or abuse.

• Complex trauma which is exposure to varied & multiple traumatic events, often of an invasive nature.

I tend to treat clients presenting with unresolved trauma of the emotional & psychological nature. This may be related to upbringing and messaging learned in childhood that were toxic & now must be unlearned in order to not be repeated and/or continue to cause internal distress, external anger, resentment, shame or self-blame. Make no mistake the messaging we learn in childhood, as we are essentially 'sponges' at that time is powerful & can be deeply impactful. Sometimes we must examine and release the toxic, faulty messaging even if it was "well-intentioned". 

Self Awareness

Self awareness encompasses many areas of personality including beliefs, values, aspirations & perception. If one lacks awareness they may struggle with understanding how they present to others. They may also make the same errors repeatedly or pursue options that are misaligned with who they truly are. Low self awareness can result in feelings of sadness, confusion, anxiety or irritability about time "wasted". 

Establishing Healthy Boundaries

Boundaries are extremely important. This cannot be overstated. It is critical to identify your boundaries in life (related to time, work, people, physical, intimate) and work to clearly communicate these boundaries. Along with identifying boundaries it is important to learn to implement them & assure they are maintained. Unclear, confused, or absent boundaries are often linked with other mental health struggles. 

Learning to Cope

Clearly life can be stressful. Learning useful ways to cope with one's stressors & triggers is truly very important. People tend to minimize the value in actually having identified coping skills which they engage in regularly. There seems to be a misperception that yoga, exercise & meditation are the only healthy coping skills and if those aren't what one is doing then why do anything. That's faulting thinking in of itself. Of course those are quite obviously very good options and universally have positive effects on the mind & body. However, reality is not every person is going to regularly engage in these options. It is necessary to identify healthy coping skills that fit your personality, interests and lifestyle & use them frequently. 

Assertiveness

Assertiveness is about self confidence, respect and clarity in communication. Essentially, it is being able to stand up for yourself and say what you mean & mean what you say in an appropriate manner to all involved. Assertive and Aggressive are not the same thing. Although people do tend to falsely equate the two. Many may have been given that faulty message in childhood. This is a limiting message and may keep a person stuck in situations that are not serving their best interest. Individuals who lack assertiveness may struggle with people pleasing, unhealthy boundaries and lower self esteem. 

Thought Spirals

Spiraling in thought can be related to Anxiety, ADHD, OCD, Self Doubt and Social Anxieties. The spiraling is often grounded in catastrophizing and fearing the worst case outcome as well as hyperfixation. This can lead to an intensification of negative symptoms and a significant amount of time may be consumed by the spiraling. 

Decreasing Self-Sabotage

Self sabotaging behaviors can be an insidious way people interfere or preclude their own success. This can present in many ways from constantly choosing partners, friends, or jobs you are not compatible with. It may also be remaining in patterns of communication & interaction that lead to the same spirals. Self sabotage may also be related to one remaining stuck in a pattern of self-talk or perspective that is no longer applicable to your life as it is now.

Faulty Thinking Patterns

Often linked with self sabotage tendencies are faulty thinking patterns or cognitive distortions. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy in general does challenge one's thinking patterns. Engaging in faulty thinking at times is normal. It is when one minimizes their patterns of thinking & primarily engages in faulty thinking repeatedly that may inhibit their growth, their ability to make new connections & their ability to adapt that can be very problematic. A few examples of faulty thinking are: all-or-nothing/ black-or-white, catastrophizing, magical thinking, emotional reasoning, magnification & minimization, 'should' statements. 

Setting Realistic Expectations

Quite simply if you do not set realistic expectations of yourself, others and even your surroundings then you will likely be experiencing endless amounts of frustration, disappointment and hopelessness. Consistently having unrealistic expectations can create feelings of resentment towards others and self-loathing towards self. 

Increasing Self-Worth

Self worth is defined as the sense of one's value or worth as a person. Self worth focuses on self-love, self-understanding and self-acceptance. Our assessment of our self worth may be directly linked to the way we act as well as what we may tolerate from others in how they treat us.

People Pleasing

These behaviors can oftentimes relate to perfectionism. Many people pleasers will sacrifice self care and overextend themselves to others. People pleasing can be a behavior and expectation that was established in childhood which may have been positively reinforced. As this progresses into adulthood it can lead to anxiety, resentment and general feelings of emotional burn out.  

Resolving Feelings of Shame

Shame is defined as a painful emotion from having done something "wrong" or "unproper". To experience shameful feelings, at times is not in of itself problematic, however if one cannot process and resolve these feelings it can be limiting & toxic. For some individuals the intensity of shame may be incongruent with the actual behavior/situation engaged in. Shame, of course, can also be misplaced onto self and this can directly impact self-worth. 

Navigating Through Life Transitions

Much of life is spent in states of transition including in our friendships, situationships & relationships. We transition between schools, out of schools & into the "adult" world for jobs, for people or away from people. We transition within our own beliefs, identities and values. There are continuous transitions throughout the various stages of "Adulting". Transitions are a normal part of life however they can be stressful and challenging to navigate. It is important to have guidance & support along the way.

Parent/Child Dynamics (through the lifespan)

All relationships go through transitions and as family relationships are often longer term if not lifetime relationships it can be important to learn how to adapt & change within these relationships. What was once true of a parent or child at one phase of life may not remain to be true. Adaptability is important.  

Identity Exploration & Development

Identity is related to our self-image. It encompasses our beliefs, core values, and sense of purpose. Identity significantly guides the process by which one determines how they may fit within the world. Identity can be related to many areas including: physical identity, sexual identity, spiritual identity, professional identity, gender identity and overall personal identity. Identity tends to be closely aligned with our ability to present authentically. 

Managing Grief & Loss

Part of the human experience is encountering & coping with loss. This is unavoidable. Grief and loss encompass many areas including but not limited to the death of a loved one, a pet, the loss of a relationship, job or an unexpected change in health. Grief & loss may be related to a dream or narrative we had for self which may no longer be an option. Heartache is real and can be devastating. It is important to put words to our emotions and allow them to move opposed to remaining stagnant. Processing emotions surrounding grief & loss may not entirely heal them but it allows for living with the loss to feel more manageable. 

Further Specialties are listed on About. Take note that some behaviors & tendencies may co-occur within the above noted treatment areas.